Wednesday, 24 February 2016
100 WC Week 8
"You gotta have a public image, look like you're doing good for the world," My manager said, "Help a child achieve their dreams of becoming a dancer, start a swimming club."
I nodded.
*****
When I got up on stage, I saw all the people watching me, and I realized that I had the chance to change the world.
"This started off as a way to improve my public image, but now I realize I have a chance to help. You can go green, get an electric car instead of a gas one, but, most likely, what you really care about is what makes the most change. You choose. As for me, I think I'll start with renting my summer house out at low prices so that the less fortunate can have the luxury for once."
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I have too many words. Please let me know what to take out
ReplyDeleteI like your powerful words but your sentences are a bit jumbled but very good use of your words.
ReplyDeletevery good but i thouhgt it was kinda confuseing
ReplyDeletevery good but i thouhgt it was kinda confuseing
ReplyDeleteYou should use a new line after a person speaks. I think you could remove the line "I saw all the people watching me" and great job on your story this week.
ReplyDeleteI like how you tied in a message into your story this week. Again, well done revising and editing your story it really shows in the quality work you produce.
ReplyDeleteI like how you tied in a message into your story this week. Again, well done revising and editing your story it really shows in the quality work you produce.
ReplyDelete